Teaching what you don't want to

I had to do two of the hardest things I have ever done in my life today. Early this afternoon, I had to let go of my darling Siamese cat, Chicken Wing. After that, I had to teach my daughter about death. This has not been a fun day.

My cat had renal kidney failure, a common occurrence in Siamese, about for years ago. She was bad. I didn't know how she was going to make it but she did. She bouncedback well. She relapsed two and a half years ago but was bounced back yet again. I took her to the vet because she wasn't herself the last few days. She always sleeps next to me on the bed and she hadn't popped up there in three days and hadn't eaten in that time as well. I knew what was happening so I called the vet for the next possible appointment. I thought she was going to be okay because she was much more responsive that her first episode and I could actually get her to purr last night.

After he ran test, he called and told me that her result came back that her kidneys had all but completely shut down. We could hydrate her and try to jump start them and then if that worked, which was a maybe, she would have to get an IV injection of fluids under her skin every day for the rest of her life. She hates that damn thing. At that point, there was only one option. I couldn't have her live like that. She would fear me for the rest of her life and I would be keeping her alive so she could hide from me because she'd see me as that needle and I can't do the IV everyday. It hurts me too much.

I called my mom on the way to the vet and she came up to meet me. Thank God for that woman. There was no way she was going to let me go through this alone even though it pained her. My dad always took care of these things when they needed to be done. So together we sent her off with a lot of tears and an immense amount of love.

Then I had to tell my daughter that Chicken was gone. I told her in the car in the parking lot at school.I didn't think she'd get it as much as she did but she cried and cried and cried. I had to explain that Chicken was in Heaven. That's when she got me. She was so concerned that Chicken missed her and that she had no one to love her up in Heaven and that she would be sad. Then came the reassuring that Heaven is a good place and gave her the long list of people and pets that were already there. She felt happy that Chicken insisted on spending her last few days on her bed in her room. She said it's because Chicken loves her. I think so.

Chicken was in my life for 12 years. She loved me when I was sick. She beat up my yellow lab regularly. She could draw you over to her from across the room with her eyes. She had impeccable taste in men. She could catch a bird mid-flight even though she had no claws. She yelled at me when I got home from vacations but forgave me everytime. She was company enough when I had none. My life is definitely missing something now.

Comments

[Broadwaymatron]

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

[Nicole]

I am so sorry for you both

[Melissa]

I'm so sorry for you, Vanessa, Peapod too.

[Pollywog]

I'm so sorry about the little Wing. That sucks. It was very brave of you to let her go. Lots of love to you and the young'un.

[Welby]

My sincere condolences, darling.

[Monique]

I'm so sorry for you. Losing a pet is never easy. You were brave to do the right thing for Chicken Wing.

[Susan Sonnen]

I am in tears. They do work their way into our souls, don't they?
I wish you and your family comfort and peace.